We discovered last week that I was pregnant. What we thought was about 5wks ended up being more like 10weeks. Over the course of 7 days I was curled up in bed and miscarried two babies, 6 days apart. the above note is about this loss and love.
I feel like miscarriage is spoken of by very few and the silence of this loss is deafening. I have been humbled, broken, softened and blessed by my past 7days as a mama.
For all the mama's who have gone before me with this loss, my offer for bringing meals, hugs, laughs, a bottle of wine or to watch your other children, I wish I could have known better how to love and bless you.
But as I said, empathy is learned and now that I have learned it well, I know that God is going to use these wee ones in my tapestry of healing for other mama's.
Rough start to a blog eh? Feel free to not follow my junk BUT for right now, now that you're reading, catch this.
Maybe it is my personality that wants our loss to somehow be spoken of, out of the closet, under the light or simply to bring healing to someone else. Quite possibly I just want you to know what miscarriage, the beauty and the pain in it is like in case you ever come across a mama who is silent but in pain.
Beautiful blog Jen. Seems like an eternity ago now that our lives are blessed by Caden, but before him I miscarried twins at 10 weeks as well.
ReplyDeleteHugs and love always Nancy
Hugs. Love you.
ReplyDeleteLove you dearly.
ReplyDeleteYou are a whisper of my past that keeps sprinkling beauty in my present dear lady. I am glad you wrote this. I miscarried before my third and shared the feelings of the experience mostly with myself.I did before my miscarriage and still do believe it can be a beautiful healing gift for a soul to rest in a womb for a time without at that time and place needing to move through a whole life. Once again you have offered a healing space for another soul.
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